Can You Love Your Body & Get Plastic Surgery?

As a coach who helps you work on your relationship with your body, I always get the question, "You think I shouldn’t get plastic surgery, right?" As a coach who helps you work on your relationship to your body, people often want my permission to go under the knife, or to use me as the excuse to say no. But as a coach who helps you work on your relationship with your body, I can throw a question back at them: “What are you really looking to change?”

I can't say I'm against plastic surgery. I've had it. More than once. Full disclosure: I was 18 years old and in the throes of a major eating disorder. I was home for the holidays, and remember shopping for pants. Department store lighting is not flattering, and although I was not overweight, in the middle of Macy's I had a meltdown looking at my thighs. That spring I had liposuction. The doctor removed a total of three pounds from a combination of my abdomen,thighs and hips. My body looked virtually the same. I still hated myself and continued to diet. Nothing changed.

I went to therapy, a nutritionist, and worked on myself. I learned to be kinder to myself, and learned that other people’s bodies weren't that different than mine. My recovery process began.

Full disclosure: When I was 26, my acting manager suggested I get my nose done. She said I wasn't pretty enough to go out for the pretty girl roles, but wasn't ugly enough to go out for the ugly girl roles. Hollywood can be fucked up.

I went to talk to a plastic surgeon about rhinoplasty. The difference was that this time I already liked my face. I decided to get the surgery. I liked my face after.

The reason I share both stories: plastic surgery wasn't the reason I feel good about myself. I like myself. 

If you are considering getting plastic surgery, sit back and look at what it is you're really trying to change. Society has ridiculous standards for what people should look like. No one really looks like that. We're all different shapes, sizes, colors, all beautiful in our own way. (I know, cue the obligatory eye roll.)  Here’s the thing - if getting a tummy tuck, or a breast lift, or a nose job is going to make you feel better and empowered, then go for it! But if it's only going to magnify the other things about yourself you'd like to change, then perhaps the work you need to do is within.